"if you die, you're completely happy
and your soul somewhere lives on.
I'm not afraid of dying
Total peace after death,
becoming someone else
is the best hope i've got..!!!"
Kurt Cobain, born Kurt Donald Cobain on 20 February 1967, in
Aberdeen, Washington, was a talented, troubled performer who became a
rock legend with his band Nirvana in the 1990s.
Growing
up in a small logging town, Cobain showed an interest in art and music.
He excelled at drawing, so much so that his talents were even apparent
in kindergarten. He also learned to play piano by ear and enjoyed a
kiddie drum kit his parents had given him. At his father's urging,
Cobain also played a little league baseball. He sometimes spent time
with his little sister Kim who was born in 1971, but both Cobain
children had to deal with their parents yelling and fighting as their
marriage became increasingly stormy.
After his parents divorced
when he was nine, Cobain became withdrawn. He went to live with his
father after the divorce. On the weekends, he would visit his mother and
his sister. When his father remarried, Cobain resented his stepmother
Jenny and her two children. One of the bright spots of this difficult
time was a present he received from his uncle Chuck—a guitar. Although
the instrument was fairly beat up, it inspired Cobain to learn to play
and it offered him a respite from his unhappiness at home. Alienated and
angry, he believed that his father always took his stepmother’s side
and favoured her children and his half-brother Chad who had been born in
1979. Cobain began experimenting with drugs in his mid-teens, and he
pushed himself farther away from his father.
In 1982, Cobain left
his father’s place and bounced around from relative to relative for
several months. He then went to live with his mother who was with her
boyfriend Pat O’Connor at the time (they later married). Attending high
school in Aberdeen, he impressed teachers and students with his artistic
talents. Cobain seemed to have odd tastes in subject matter, drawing a
sperm transforming into an embryo for one project, according to 'Heavier
than Heaven: A Biography of Kurt Cobain' by Charles R. Cross.
Cobain’s
life changed when he started listening punk rock. Discovering a local
punk band, the Melvins, he befriended Buzz Osbourne, a member of the
group. Osbourne introduced him to some other punk bands, such as the Sex
Pistols. The Melvins often practiced in a space near drummer Dale
Crover’s house and a lot of fans, including Cobain, came to these
sessions and hung out. As high school progressed, he was doing more
drinking and drugging. Cobain also got into fights with his mother who
was also drinking a lot, and he could not stand his stepfather.
Cobain
spent much of 1984 and 1985 living in various places. He spent time
living with friends when he could and sleeping in apartment building
hallways and a hospital waiting room when he did not have any other
place to crash. In July 1985, Cobain was arrested for spray painting
buildings in town with some of his friends. His friends got away, but
Cobain was caught and taken to the police station. He later received a
fine and a suspended sentence for his actions. Several months later,
Cobain started his first band, Fecal Matter. They recorded a few songs
together at his aunt Mari’s house, but they never played any gigs.
The
next year Cobain was in trouble with the law again after being found
wandering around an abandoned building drunk at night. As a result, he
ended up spending several days in jail. Cobain started playing music
with bassist Krist Novoselic who was two years older than him. They knew
each other from Novoselic’s younger brother Robert and from hanging
around The Melvins. A local drummer named Aaron Burckhard soon joined
in. Their first gig was a house party in 1987. This same year, Cobain
started going out with Tracy Marander, his first serious girlfriend. The
two eventually were living together in Olympia. Although they struggled
financially, the couple seemed to enjoy the rock and roll lifestyle.
Cobain spent a lot of his time exploring different creative
outlets—writing, painting, drawing, and making collages.
In 1988,
Cobain was able to make some of his rock ambitions come true. He
finally settled on the name Nirvana for the group. They made their first
single, 'Love Buzz', which was released by the small independent label
Sub Pop Records. By this time, Burckhard was out and Chad Channing had
taken over drumming duties. Nirvana’s popularity in the Seattle music
scene was growing, and they released their debut album, 'Bleach', in
1989. While it failed to make much of a splash, the recording showed
signs of Cobain’s emerging talent as a songwriter, especially the ballad
'About a Girl'. Their signature sound, which included elements of punk
and heavy metal, was also apparent on the album. Cobain felt mistreated
by Sub Pop, believing that the company devoted more resources toward
promoting other acts such as Soundgarden and Mudhoney.
While his
band was struggling to make it, Cobain made a fateful connection in his
personal life. In 1990, Cobain met his match in an edgy rocker named
Courtney Love. The two met at a show at the Portland, Oregon nightclub
Satyricon. While they were interested in each other, their relationship
did not get off the ground until much later.
That same year, he
got a chance to know some of his rock and roll heroes when the band
toured with Sonic Youth. Nirvana was going through some internal changes
at the time. Their friend Dale Crover filled in on drums, as Cobain and
Novoselic had kicked out Channing. After the tour, they finally found a
replacement in Dave Grohl who had played with Washington, D.C. hardcore
band Scream.
Despite their antiestablishment and punk
tendencies, Nirvana made the leap to a major label in 1991 when they
signed with Geffen Records. That same year, they released 'Nevermind',
which spearheaded a music revolution. With the raw edges of punk and the
blistering guitars of metal, their sound was labeled “grunge” for its
murky and rough qualities.
The single 'Smells Like Teen
Spirit'—like many Nirvana tracks—modulated between the soft and the
thrashing. And Cobain was equally convincing as he sang the song’s
mellow chorus and as he screamed its final lines. It proved to be the
group’s biggest single and helped take the entire album to the top of
the charts.
Soon, Cobain was being called one of the best
songwriters of his generation. This, along with the rapid rise of the
group, put pressure on the talented and sensitive 24-year-old. Cobain
began to worry about how his music was being received and how to regain
control of a seemingly uncontrollable future. He had started using
heroin in the early 1990s. The drug provided an escape as well as some
relief for his chronic stomach problems.
While his
personal life was in turmoil, Cobain had continued success
professionally. Nirvana's highly acclaimed album 'In Utero' was released
in September 1993 and went to the top of the album charts. Full of
highly personal lyrics by Cobain about his many life struggles, the
recording featured a fair amount of hostility toward people and
situations that Cobain reviled. He took on the recording industry with
'Radio Friendly Unit Shifter'. It also had some more tender moments
with 'Heart-Shaped Box', which is supposed to be about his marriage to
Love. Guitar Player magazine described the album as having “a startling
level of anger, energy, and jaded intelligence.”
On 5 April 1994, in
the guest house behind his Seattle home, Cobain committed suicide. He
placed a shotgun into his mouth and fired, killing himself instantly. He
left a lengthy suicide note in which he addressed his many fans as well
as his wife and young daughter. Despite the official ruling of his
death as a suicide, some have wondered whether it was murder and whether
Love had been involved in his death.
Even after death, Cobain
continued to intrigue and inspire fans. The group released 'Unplugged in
New York' shortly after Cobain’s death and it went to the top of the
charts. Two years later, a collection of their songs entitled 'From the
Muddy Banks of the Wishkah' was released, and again the group scored a
huge hit, reaching the number three spot on the album charts.
With
Cobain gone, there has been a struggle about what to do with what he
left behind. Grohl and Novoselic fought with Love for years over
Nirvana’s music. In September 2002, Love announced that they had finally
resolved their long legal battle over unreleased material. An anthology
of their songs, 'Nirvana', was released that year, including the
previously unreleased track 'You Know You’re Right'. Two collections
that included other previously unreleased material followed with 2004’s
'With the Lights Out' and 2005’s 'Sliver: The Best of the Box'.
Heavier Than Heaven: The Biography of Kurt Cobain by Charles R. Cross
Sources: http://www.thebiographychannel.co.uk/biographies/kurt-cobain.html